The Cassie Chronicles - She's Back

Cassie’s learning a new way to talk to her customers - and to Skinny Bitch. It’s all about love and semantics. Do you feel it?

Vocabulary Test

A few weeks ago we had a seminar for sales and customer service. Three days of a man named Chuck with slicked back hair, pungent cologne and loud ties, telling us how to interact with customers. It seems we’ve been doing things all wrong.

First was the vocabulary lesson. Chuck’s handout showed two columns. Column A listed words we currently use. Column B proposed better choices. I studied my handout.

Column A said “Project”. Column B said “Community”.

“Never say project,” Chuck told us. “The word has no heart. People can’t feel attached to a project. They’re looking for a community to belong to, a comfortable home environment.”

Column A said “Tract”. Column B said “Neighborhood”.

“Same principle here,” Chuck said. “Tract equals a lifeless plot of dirt. Who wants to live in a tract?” He waited for a response and seemed pleased to receive none. “That’s right!” Chuck exclaimed. “It’s a neighborhood people want. In a neighborhood, people look out for one another. Everyone wants that.”

“Are we supposed to use these words in Customer Service, too?” someone asked.

“Oh, yes,” Chuck replied. “This is a whole new company vocabulary. Put Column A behind you. Embrace Column B. Soon you’ll feel the love coming from everyone, buyers and co-workers alike.”

Skinny Bitch was beaming, eating up everything Chuck said. So was Art Baker, the head of customer service. The rest of us squirmed in our straight-backed chairs.

Since then there has been a steady stream of emails from Skinny Bitch reminding us of our new jargon. Replacement price sheets have arrived listing “Home Sites” instead of “Lots”. It’s not Tract 16632, but the Neighborhood of Bella Vista in the Community of Cantata del Mar. A new sign out front announces the Sales Gallery, not the Sales Office, and we don’t sell houses, we offer homes. People don’t go to the Design Center anymore to pick their upgrades, it’s the Design Studio. Oops, they aren’t upgrades, they’re customizing options. Standard items are now included features. And according to my new business card I’m a sales counselor, not a sales representative.

We are all trying very hard to embrace this change, because times are tough in real estate and we’re afraid we’ll be caught using the wrong word and be out on our keesters.

So, Skinny Bitch’s call today surprised me.

“Cassie,” she said, “We’re reviewing your project and need to know if the buyers of Lot 52 in Tract 16632 have gone to the Design Center yet to pick the upgrades for their house.”

Hmmm. Was this a test? I wasn’t taking any chances.

“Let me check the paperwork for my community, Tina,” I said. “Yes, the Wilsons went to the Design Studio on November 3^rd to select customizing options for their home on Home Site 52 in our neighborhood, just like I counseled them to do.”

I figure I aced it. And yes, Chuck, I do feel the love.

Copyright 2009, Liz Zuercher