The "Grandma's Hats" Caption Contest

The writers took a jaunt to San Juan Capistrano and got a little goofy browsing through the antique barn complex. Liz began trying on old hats, Susan M. started taking pictures, and Susan C. provided on-the-spot captions. This blog post is the result, except we all added our own captions. You can participate, too, in what I'm calling the "Grandma's Hats" Caption Contest. Go to the "Comments" section and add your own captions. You have exactly one week to participate.  Deadline is midnight next Sunday. Grand Prize winner will receive a month's supply of Polident, a free consultation with an orthopedic shoe expert, and a leather-bound book called "Becoming One with Your Walker." Runners-up get nothing.

#1

Grandma goes to church.

Grandma knows the secret handshake.

Grandma's marching with the suffragettes.

 #2

Grandma goes to a garden party.

Grandma does not eat the daisies; the daisies eat grandma.

Grandma is elected president of the Garden Club. She insists on being addressed as "Madame Chairman."

 #3

Grandma interviews for a headmistress position.

Grandma is veiled in mystery.

Grandma channels her inner Eleanor Roosevelt.

 #4

Grandma loves a bargain.

Grandma channels the ghost of Minnie Pearl.

Though grief-stricken, Grandma finds the perfect hat for grandpa's funeral, which just perks her right up. 

 #5

Grandma meets the queen.

Grandma is Pope of the Infidels.

Grandma wants to be Pharoah.

 #6

Grandma tricks out her firehat.

Grandma stages a coup d'etat of the Red Hat Society.

Grandma moonlights as a court jester.



 #7

Grandma becomes a bird for a day.

Grandma dusts the attic with her head.

Grandma makes the best of the death of her pet ostrich.



 #8

Where's Grandma?

Grandma is a Drag Queen.

Grandma goes beatnik.



 #9

Grandma goes big game hunting.

Grandma goes on safari.

Grandma's new Corvette convertible came with a free "wind" control driving hat.

 

 #10

Grandma orders a margarita.

Grandma says, "A mi me gusta mi sombrero."

Grandma makes a "run for the border."

 #11

Grandma squares off with Rooster Cogburn.

Grandma tames the west.

Grandma pays homage to Dale Evans.

 #12

Grandma flips out altogether.

Grandma says, "Nyah, nyah, ny, nyah, nyah."
Grandma goes native after reading Conrad's "Heart of Darkness" and decides to join Kurtz in the jungle and found her own tribe.

#13 

Grandma goes to Alaska to feed Sarah Palin to the bears.

Grandma is Lady Dowager Snooty-Smythe.

Grandma makes a fashion statement of roadkill.

 #14

Grandma makes good friends with a ferret.

Grandma is the Angel of Fur for a day.

Why is grandma wearing a sausage?

 #15

Grandma goes to the symphony.

Grandma is captured by the purple-people eater.

Grandma is ready for the Easter Parade.

 #16

Grandma goes rowing on the Thames.

Grandma paddles the gondola.

Grandma's favorite movie is "Pollyanna."

 #17

Grandma tries to sneak into the Royal Wedding.

Grandma channels Miss Havisham.

Grandma decides to become a beekeeper.

 #18

Grandma dons her camouflage gear to hide out in the garden. Who knows why?

Grandma accidentally sticks her head in the birthday cake.

Grandma is "mother of the bride."

 #19

Grandma blings out her yarmulke.

Grandma goes bird-watching and the birds mistake her for a nest.

Grandma pays tribute to Mamie Eisenhower.

 #20

Grandma goes in search of Johnny Depp.

Grandma is a badass Hell's Angel transvestite golfer.

Grandma's souvenir hat from her former lover, Bing Crosby.

#21

Grandma goes to Ascot.

Grandma drinks mint juleps at the Kentucky Derby.

Grandma thinks she's Scarlett O'Hara.